The Return Trip

There are three essential parts to any road trip - the trip there, the visit, and the trip home. All three of these have completely unique aspects to them. During the trip there, an excitement unlike anything else permeates the air. You've been looking forward to this for a long time, and now you're breaking out of the routine to do something special. The visit itself always goes too fast, and more often than not it exceeds your expectations. After looking forward to the visit for so long, when it finally comes, it goes by in the blink of an eye. The return trip, though, is whole different kettle of fish.

Being somewhat melancholic in temperament, I relish the return trip. It is a time for reflection, a time to start moving a little bit more slowly. Usually on the return trip, I enjoy taking my time. I'm not in a rush, I just want to drive and think about everything that just happened. There is an element of sadness in it, since what you have looked forward to for such a long time is now over. However, there is also a fullness. You have been given great blessings and often seen loved ones, and now you are on your way home.

Of course, Liz and I had the chance to experience this just this past weekend. On Wednesday, we drove out to Hilary Schafer and Clement Bataille's wedding in Lafayette, IN. The wedding was beautiful, particularly since they had been engaged for such a long time, and it was wonderful to see old friends again. All of this really sank in on the return trip, though. It was only at that point that we had enough time to sit quietly and think about everything that was said and done. During the weekend, things just happened too fast to really process. It took silence, and in some sense separation, to really appreciate what had just happened.

The experience of the return trip, though, is hardly unique in life. In some sense, the whole experience of a road trip is like life itself. There is the anxious build up to being an adult when you are young, there are your adult years (which already seem to be going faster and faster right now), and finally in old age you are able to slow down and reflect on what has just happened. This is why old people are so famous for their stories; they have entered into a time of life when reflection has become truly possible. They have become separated from the hustle and bustle of early life, and now they can draw out wisdom from everything that's happened. You know a culture like ours has gone down the wrong path when a period in life like old age, a period for reflection and wisdom, is detested.

Old age and return trips are full of sadness and joy. Both involve a sort of sadness at the end of something good. I've heard old timers talk about raising their families and building their lives with something like sorrow in their voices. They recognize how good those times were, and they know they can never get them back.

At the same time, both return trips and old age are times of great joy as well. Though there is a sadness when you are coming back from a long trip, there is also an anticipation for home. This anticipation is different from the anticipation of going out; it's not so much an anticipation for adventure but rather an anticipation for rest. It's the image of the weary traveler returning home. It's the joy of knowing that your bed lies just a few more miles down the road. Old age certainly seems to have this joy. Like on a return trip, old age brings with it a longing for rest. "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith; in the future there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day; and not only to me, but also to all who have loved His appearing." 2 Timothy 4: 7-8


God gives us these short periods of life (like the return trip) and longer periods of life (like old age) to wonder at His goodness. If he grants me the gift of old age, I do believe I will enjoy it.  Until then, I hope our culture comes to appreciate each period in life - youth, maturity, and old age. Each has a completely unique blessing to offer.

Ups, Downs, and All Arounds: Part 1

Sometimes God shows us how much He loves us by making everything go right. Sometimes, He shows us how much He loves us by giving us small gifts when everything is going wrong. This past weekend was certainly one of those latter times for Liz and I.

As some of you may know, Liz's brother Freddie moved up to New Hampshire about a year ago to begin working at Thomas More College. Since then, we haven't really had a chance to see much of him and his family, so Liz and I decided we would take the 4th of July weekend to travel up north and visit the family. It's a 10 hour car ride up to New Hampshire, so Liz and I aimed to leave by 8:00 in the morning on Thusday. Since having a baby, though, we have discovered that leaving times are very flexible, so instead we left at 8:30. It was a beautiful cool morning, and we were able to roll the windows in the car down and enjoy the countryside as we drove. We started out on Interstate 81, and went North through West Virginia, Maryland, and Pennsylvania. The stretch of 81 through Pennsylvania is a particular favorite of mine since you can see a number of Amish farms from the Interstate, which is pleasing to me but probably maddening to the Amish.

Alan was good through out this time, sleeping in his car seat and only fussing when he got hungry. After stopping once or twice to feed Alan, we got on to I-78 which would take us towards New York City, where we would turn more north into Connecticut. Though Alan was still asleep, I needed to stop for gas, so I pulled off at the exit for Bloomsbury, NJ. Unfortunately, the car would never reenter 78. After stopping for gas and to use the restroom, we hopped back in the car ready and rearing to go when our 280,000 mile car finally failed us.

I turned the key once, and the car valiantly struggled to start.... but failed. I turned they key again, and it still struggled but not so valiantly. After a third try, and a more pitiful attempt by the car, I knew we were in trouble. We opened the hood, waved a couple of nice people down (they were actually on the way to the hospital to see their newborn grandson), and tried to start the car, but all to no avail. So, after trying what we could, we had to call a tow truck to take it to a shop.

We broken down right around 1:00, but weren't able to get the car to the shop until 4:00. This meant that we'd have to wait a night in New Jersey before continuing our journey northwards. This loss of a day was the hardest thing for Liz and I. Though we both tried to shoulder on, it definitely brought our spirits down. We had planned to drive up on Thursday and back on Tuesday, giving us four full days with Freddie and Nicole. By losing a day, we knew we were losing a significant part of the trip. We had also been planning to visit Liz's godfather on Friday, but now we would have to cancel that visit.

We checked into a hotel that night and then found out that a cousin of Liz's mom lived close by, so we made arrangements to meet with her the next day. The cousin (who we call "Aunt Pat") offered to visit with us and also to drive us to the shop if needed. As it would turn out, we'd be incredibly greatful for this later.
And so the next morning we waited. When we'd dropped the car off, the mechanic had told us that there was a problem with the o-rings and that he could get us on the road before noon the next day. So, Liz and I waited anxiously, fearing we'd have to miss another day. Around 12:45, I called the mechanic again, only to find out that after having replaced the o-rings the car still didn't start.

By this point, we were desperate to get on our way, so  Liz and I rushed to the shop with the aid of Aunt Pat. After grabbing a few things from the car, Aunt Pay drove us to a rental car place just a few miles away, where we were able to rent a Dodge Durango (very luxurious, by the way). Finally, around 3:00 on Friday, we were on our way again. At the hour of mercy, the Lord let us continue our journey. I can't tell you how good it felt to be on the road again. With each passing mile, the stress from the previous 26 hours wore off. Slowly we made our way towards New Hampshire, just thankful to be on the road again.

Though our trip had been stressful, we knew God had given us the gift of breaking down near family (after Aunt Pat, the closest family was 3 hours away!) and before we got to New York City. As we went along, other blessings made themselves evident. It was a warmer day than the day before, but the rental car had air condition, which was something our little car was lacking. Going through New York City we had to cross the George Washington Bridge, but didn't have the money for the toll. So, God sent my guardian angel (a 5' 10" guant Mexican with long greasy black hair smoking a cigarette) to let us pass without paying the toll.

After 6 1/2 hours in the car, we arrived at Freddie and Nicole's so thankful to be visiting. Losing a day had made us incredibly grateful just for the time we were being given. We felt like Odysseus coming home from the Trojan war, except that Freddie and Nicole didn't have people trying to take our place.

To be continued....