Ups, Downs, and All Arounds: Part 2

Family is truly an amazing thing. It's spectacular to think that we are placed with people to grow up with, people whom we have literally known our entire lives. We're given parents, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles and cousins to love and serve throughout our lives. We're given the opportunity to watch them grow and develop, to watch them change and mature. The family is a good that God has given us so that we might see what it's like when persons truly know and love each other. And we must come to know what this is like, so that we might come to know the Triune God.

In today's modern world, though, it has become the norm for families to live thousands of miles apart. In the past, it was more traditional for marriages to occur between a man and a woman of a local community. By "marrying local," as it were, the large majority of people continued to live around their family. However, modern means of transportation have largely changed that. Today, people move around very easily and often end up far from families. Don't get me wrong, without modern transportation I couldn't have gone to Christendom, and a small town boy from Illinois might not have met the woman of his dreams from Michigan! I simply wish to point out that while modern transportation has made life easier in some ways, it has also made it harder.

Thus, on the one hand, our trip up to New Hampshire was only made possible by modern transportation. On the other hand, though, the trip was also made necessary by the willingness to live far apart that modern transportation tends to engender.  It's interesting how the same thing can bring so many blessings and yet also so many difficulties.

In the end, though, the trip up to New Hampshire was an incredible blessing. We were able to spend 3 full days with Freddie, Nicole, and the kids, even after the fiasco of the ride up. Much of this time was spent in conversation - in beautiful reflections, jokes, stories and even a few debates. Most mornings we were able to sit around leisurely in the kitchen and just talk. The afternoons were spent visiting other family, friends in the area, and even traveling to Liz's childhood home. This hour long trip out to Tilton and Hill, NH was particularly fun. When your married, it's an incredible blessing to be able to glimpse a part of your spouse's life that occurred years before the two of you had ever met. You hear stories, of course, about those places. As you become a member of your spouse's family you're bound to hear a large number of stories. So, for me to actually see where these stories happened was a great blessing.

The whole time we were up there, it really struck me what beautiful families God has placed in Liz and I's life. Many families have serious divisions in them, and I pray for these families with my whole heart. It was not meant to be so. But in Liz and I's case, we realized that though we may be far from some of our family, they are still truly family. We don't stop being a family because of distance. We're too close to them. And it fills me with joy to think that, God-willing, one day we'll all be present together in from of Him Who Is, and we'll know each other in a more true light. Until then, trips to New Hampshire, Michigan, Illinois and just down the road in Virginia remain glimpses of the life to come.

Ups, Downs, and All Arounds: Part 1

Sometimes God shows us how much He loves us by making everything go right. Sometimes, He shows us how much He loves us by giving us small gifts when everything is going wrong. This past weekend was certainly one of those latter times for Liz and I.

As some of you may know, Liz's brother Freddie moved up to New Hampshire about a year ago to begin working at Thomas More College. Since then, we haven't really had a chance to see much of him and his family, so Liz and I decided we would take the 4th of July weekend to travel up north and visit the family. It's a 10 hour car ride up to New Hampshire, so Liz and I aimed to leave by 8:00 in the morning on Thusday. Since having a baby, though, we have discovered that leaving times are very flexible, so instead we left at 8:30. It was a beautiful cool morning, and we were able to roll the windows in the car down and enjoy the countryside as we drove. We started out on Interstate 81, and went North through West Virginia, Maryland, and Pennsylvania. The stretch of 81 through Pennsylvania is a particular favorite of mine since you can see a number of Amish farms from the Interstate, which is pleasing to me but probably maddening to the Amish.

Alan was good through out this time, sleeping in his car seat and only fussing when he got hungry. After stopping once or twice to feed Alan, we got on to I-78 which would take us towards New York City, where we would turn more north into Connecticut. Though Alan was still asleep, I needed to stop for gas, so I pulled off at the exit for Bloomsbury, NJ. Unfortunately, the car would never reenter 78. After stopping for gas and to use the restroom, we hopped back in the car ready and rearing to go when our 280,000 mile car finally failed us.

I turned the key once, and the car valiantly struggled to start.... but failed. I turned they key again, and it still struggled but not so valiantly. After a third try, and a more pitiful attempt by the car, I knew we were in trouble. We opened the hood, waved a couple of nice people down (they were actually on the way to the hospital to see their newborn grandson), and tried to start the car, but all to no avail. So, after trying what we could, we had to call a tow truck to take it to a shop.

We broken down right around 1:00, but weren't able to get the car to the shop until 4:00. This meant that we'd have to wait a night in New Jersey before continuing our journey northwards. This loss of a day was the hardest thing for Liz and I. Though we both tried to shoulder on, it definitely brought our spirits down. We had planned to drive up on Thursday and back on Tuesday, giving us four full days with Freddie and Nicole. By losing a day, we knew we were losing a significant part of the trip. We had also been planning to visit Liz's godfather on Friday, but now we would have to cancel that visit.

We checked into a hotel that night and then found out that a cousin of Liz's mom lived close by, so we made arrangements to meet with her the next day. The cousin (who we call "Aunt Pat") offered to visit with us and also to drive us to the shop if needed. As it would turn out, we'd be incredibly greatful for this later.
And so the next morning we waited. When we'd dropped the car off, the mechanic had told us that there was a problem with the o-rings and that he could get us on the road before noon the next day. So, Liz and I waited anxiously, fearing we'd have to miss another day. Around 12:45, I called the mechanic again, only to find out that after having replaced the o-rings the car still didn't start.

By this point, we were desperate to get on our way, so  Liz and I rushed to the shop with the aid of Aunt Pat. After grabbing a few things from the car, Aunt Pay drove us to a rental car place just a few miles away, where we were able to rent a Dodge Durango (very luxurious, by the way). Finally, around 3:00 on Friday, we were on our way again. At the hour of mercy, the Lord let us continue our journey. I can't tell you how good it felt to be on the road again. With each passing mile, the stress from the previous 26 hours wore off. Slowly we made our way towards New Hampshire, just thankful to be on the road again.

Though our trip had been stressful, we knew God had given us the gift of breaking down near family (after Aunt Pat, the closest family was 3 hours away!) and before we got to New York City. As we went along, other blessings made themselves evident. It was a warmer day than the day before, but the rental car had air condition, which was something our little car was lacking. Going through New York City we had to cross the George Washington Bridge, but didn't have the money for the toll. So, God sent my guardian angel (a 5' 10" guant Mexican with long greasy black hair smoking a cigarette) to let us pass without paying the toll.

After 6 1/2 hours in the car, we arrived at Freddie and Nicole's so thankful to be visiting. Losing a day had made us incredibly grateful just for the time we were being given. We felt like Odysseus coming home from the Trojan war, except that Freddie and Nicole didn't have people trying to take our place.

To be continued....

The Antithesis of Ennui

I'm currently re-reading John Senior's the death of Christian Culture. For anyone who hasn't read it, I definitely encourage you to pick it up since Senior has a true mastery of contemporary thought (well, somewhat contemporary, the book was first published in 1978). Among the many topics that Senior tackles in his book is the subject of ennui. Very early on (which tells you how far I've gotten through it so far) Senior identifies ennui as one of the key characteristics of the modern age.

Indeed, it seems this boredom with the world is everywhere we look, and not just in the non-Catholic circles. So many people today seem to have a "weariness" or, as Senior describes it, a "nausea" when it comes to life. I know that I experience this. There are days where I feel like doing the same old thing is just tiresome. Working, doing dishes, paying bills, it all seems to take its toll. I look back at my college days, filled with so little responsibility and so much fun, and I think, "Wow, being fully grown-up now is boring."

Of course, this isn't what I really think of my life. Starting a family has been the greatest thing to ever happen to me. It's a constant source of joy and thanksgiving. But it struck me as I was reading Senior's work that the antithesis to ennui was exactly what I find in my family: the joys of day to day life. Ennui is rooted in a disgust of being, in a disgust of existence. But most especially, it seems to be a disgust in the every day existence. The ennui-infected modern age flees from the every day to look for the extraordinary. It is in constant search of the new and exciting experience.

True joy, though, is not found in life's new and fleeting experiences, but is found rather in the living out of the daily experience. All the things that matter most to us - God, Church, family, friends, community - are experienced mostly in daily living. An archetype for truly human and Christian daily living is found in the "hidden" years of Christ's life. For 30 years Jesus lived, worked, loved, and prayed the daily life. Our Savior spent this time rejoicing in creation, rejoicing in the ordinary. These years of Our Savior's life were the complete antithesis to ennui and to the resulting perpetual search for the new. He spent such a large portion of his life doing his daily duty, and we can hardly think that this time was wasted. I, at least, am often tempted to think these years were purely a preparation, like he was in a waiting room for 30 years before beginning his public ministry. No, he must have truly lived out human existence during this time.

I think its important to remember this. I know it is for me - doing many of the same things day in and day out. Our Lord's first 30 years of life remind me that I need to cultivate this spirit of joy in the everyday. I have my moments where I believe I do in fact accomplish this, but this type of living is something that is a continual commitment. Indeed, I think it has to be a daily commitment, one that is rooted in a relationship with Jesus Christ. All of us Catholics, myself especially, need to live in that house in Nazareth on a day to day basis. This truly Christian life is so very opposed to ennui.